By News18
Parenting styles have long reflected the values of their time, from the strict discipline of earlier generations to the more achievement-focused approaches of recent decades. But today, many parents are rewriting the rulebook entirely, seeking to raise emotionally aware, resilient, and compassionate children through what鈥檚 known as gentle parenting.
The gentle parenting approach doesn鈥檛 rely on punishment or reward systems. Instead, it prioritises respect, empathy, and clear, consistent boundaries. At its heart, gentle parenting treats children as individuals worthy of understanding, not just obedience. And in a world that increasingly values emotional intelligence and mental health, it鈥檚 gaining traction for good reason.
Kavita Kerawalla, Vice Chairperson of VIBGYOR Group of Schools, weighs in on the realities of gentle parenting: what鈥檚 resonating with today鈥檚 children and where it鈥檚 falling short for parents.
What鈥檚 Working With Gentle Parenting
1. Stronger Emotional Awareness
Children raised with gentle parenting often demonstrate an improved ability to name, understand, and manage their feelings. Rather than being told to suppress emotion, they are encouraged to explore their emotional responses and understand what鈥檚 going on internally.
2. Trust-Based Relationships
By focusing on listening rather than reacting, gentle parenting nurtures secure attachments. Kerawalla says, 鈥淲hen children know they鈥檒l be heard, they鈥檙e more likely to confide, collaborate, and respond respectfully. Trust becomes a two-way street, creating a home environment that is safe, predictable, and emotionally nurturing.鈥
3. Long-Term Behaviour Change
Instead of time-outs or consequences meant to control behaviour at the moment, gentle parenting looks for the root cause. What triggered the tantrum? What鈥檚 behind the defiance? By focusing on the 鈥榳hy鈥 rather than just the 鈥榳hat鈥, parents are able to address underlying issues, fostering behavioural change through understanding, not fear.
Where Gentle Parenting Falls Short
1. Boundaries Can Become Blurry
Kerawalla notes, 鈥淎 common misunderstanding is that being gentle with children means never saying no; however, boundaries are still an essential part of the process. But when parents avoid setting limits in the name of being kind, it can leave children feeling uncertain. Kids still need structure 鈥 boundaries that are firm, but delivered with warmth.鈥
2. It Can Be Emotionally Exhausting
Keeping your cool when emotions are running high is something most parents struggle with. Especially when juggling work, relationships, and day-to-day stress, parents may find it overwhelming to always remain composed. Gentle parenting doesn鈥檛 mean suppressing your own emotions 鈥 it means modelling healthy responses, even when things go off track.
3. Resistance From the Older Generation
Kerawalla notes, 鈥淢any parents trying out this approach face criticism from family members who were raised with different values. Comments like 鈥榶ou鈥檙e too soft鈥 or 鈥榯hey鈥檒l never learn鈥 are common, especially in cultures where discipline is still linked to authority.鈥 Navigating this gap requires confidence and a supportive circle of like-minded caregivers.
Kerawalla adds, 鈥淕entle parenting recognises that mistakes will happen 鈥 what matters is how we reconnect and move forward. It鈥檚 about consistently showing up with intention, even when things are messy.鈥 She says, 鈥淚t asks parents to pause before reacting, to listen before lecturing, and to treat each challenge as an opportunity for growth, not control. But perhaps its greatest strength is that it humanises the parenting experience itself.鈥
As this philosophy continues to gain ground, it鈥檚 not surprising to see more families leaning into it, not because it鈥檚 easier, but because it feels more aligned with the kind of world they want their children to grow up in.