By The Capitalist
Is Rachel Reeves toast? We don鈥檛 know, but we do know Jeremy Hunt wants his toaster back; catch up on the latest gossip in this week鈥檚 edition of The Capitalist
MILQUETOAST POLITICS FOR RACHEL REEVES
Kemi Badenoch may have declared Rachel Reeves 鈥渢oast鈥 at a teary PMQs yesterday afternoon, but it鈥檚 a toaster that鈥檚 got Jeremy Hunt鈥檚 goat with the Chancellor. At a recent Q&A with City law firm Crowell & Moring, the former Tory Chancellor revealed he has been trying to get his toaster back from 11 Downing Street, with his texts to Reeves yielding no result. His children love toast, he lamented. Other questions fielded by the lawyers were just as insightful, including asking if Hunt would go on Strictly. The Capitalist has no additional intel on that matter, but reportedly the former Chancellor said he can do a rhumba.
TOP OF THE STOCKS
Most families look to pass painful long journeys with impatient young children by playing eye-spy or 鈥 if that fails 鈥 reaching for the iPad. Not so in the household in which Emma Sinclair, the youngest person ever to bring a company to IPO in the UK, grew up. The Capitalist was amused to hear the Mission Capital founder tell a Rathebones event that, aged just seven, she would engage in hard fought games of 鈥榞uess the share price鈥, instead. The Capitalist heartily condones Sinclair鈥檚 gamified attempt to stay abreast of London鈥檚 magical capital markets 鈥 though they don鈥檛 quite feel brave enough to roll it out in their own home.
WHITEHALL GOES DOTTY
It鈥檚 good to know that in these times of global peril and economic fragility, the beating heart of Whitehall continues to pump out vital work for the good of the nation. Civil servants have published a 150 page dossier 鈥 longer than the Strategic Defence Review 鈥 to explain the new dot in the government鈥檚 logo. Shifting the dot in gov.uk up into the middle of the space (a typographical challenge beyond City AM鈥檚 technical ability) apparently represents 鈥渁 bridge between government and the UK鈥 鈥 and serves as 鈥渁 guiding hand for life.鈥 The rebrand (and accompanying management-speak word salad) cost a cool 拢500,000. Absolutely dotty.
Meanwhile, yesterday, The Capitalist was on the receiving end of what just might be the weirdest 鈥 or most ingenious 鈥 public relations campaign of the year. Expertly inserting itself into two hot button discussions of the week 鈥 Wimbledon and Cash Isas 鈥 investment platform IG Group tapped Aussie tennis legend Pat Cash to painstakingly explain how investing almost always generates better returns than saving. With no end of 鈥榬eturn鈥, 鈥榗ash鈥, and 鈥榮erve鈥 puns, the press release brought a wry smile to the face of your diarist; a better reaction than that of their editor, who when confronted with the campaign simply said: 鈥淕ood God.鈥
GOSSIP SERVED AT PRIVATE WIMBLEDON BASH
Wimbledon is in full swing but it鈥檚 the off-court antics where the best action is taking place. The Capitalist was invited to an exclusive garden party at a Wimbledon mansion that cost the host 拢70,000 to rent for the fortnight 鈥 all in the name of impressing rich American investors. It鈥檚 fair to say that a couple of jugs of Pimm鈥檚 and some bubbly loosened lips, and one of the very influential invitees broke the formalities to plunge into the pool. Top British players, apparel figures and Ivy League elites were all in attendance. Sadly, phones were discouraged and the party was so fabulous The Capitalist wouldn鈥檛 dare squander an invite for next year.